Surprise! After a year of not posting one blog post, I am pregnant for the third time! This time it sure hit us by surprise as it was not planned at all! It took me about a month to actually assimilate the news after I got the BFP from my first response, as I was hit by a wave of nausea just minutes before then. “HOLY SHIT,” I thought to myself as I punched my husband in his arm saying, “I am effin PREGNANT!” I was a bit disappointed in myself too, I was working so hard on losing weight that I never shed from my first pregnancy still. Even though, we did not use any contraceptives or birth controls I had been certain that we were done having more children. I had been on the Keto Diet for about three months, with a total weight loss of thirty pounds and I only had twenty more pounds to go! I know you are thinking, HOLY COW, you must have been huge, but yes I gained over SEVENTY pounds with my first pregnancy! However, I had kept the extra twenty pounds on after my second daughter too.
Fast forward, I am twenty-one weeks as of today and it finally hit me that in four months we will have a little baby again! I get anxious over it and try to research a lot about life with three kids and how to manage your life better as far as schedules, etc. go However, I will be completely honest with you that my oldest still sleeps in the same room as us. I suck at sleep training nor have I ever really even tried. I had to buy her a twin size bed to sleep in our room as my king bed was lacking the room for the four of us! So here I am, thinking how I can transition these two munchkins at four years old and eighteen months to move them out of my room for good! Am I the only human being in this world who did this to herself?! I know I am freaking nuts and what kills me even more is that my husband has adjusted to this as well! Can you feel the anxiety kicking in?! You must know how I feel now!
On top of the wonderful sleep training I must do now, I also will have to go back on my wonderful postpartum exercise and diet regime once again as I am up already fifteen pounds at twenty-one weeks and the pounds just keep piling up. To be quiet honest, I am hungry all the time and quiet frankly, if I don’t eat those hormones jump at anyone in sight! I think the stress and anxiety that just keep piling up show how much work I have to look forward to along with my sleepless nights. However, this time I want to share it, for the sense of therapy for myself, I need an outlet, and for the humor of any other person thinking how chaotic and unorganized this mom is! I am no Instagram momma! Actually, I had even deleted my Instagram account for the sake of my own mental health. I had become depressed over the fact that these perfect Instagram moms were able to just two months postpartum fit into their pre-pregnancy clothes and wear a two piece bikini! Well, I am not that momma and quiet frankly, I don’t strive to be a show-off about that type of stuff! Of course, I want to be healthy for the sake of my children.
If you are wondering what this post was about, I really don’t know, I guess it was a post to vent more so than anything. I do want to start documenting how sleep training is going and pregnancy the third time around as I can ASSURE it will be my last. We are excited to finally have a baby BOY in the family as my husband had been outnumbered by the amount of estrogen that was flowing around our home. I on the other hand, will need to look at the explicit fact that I will be a momma of three and that I will need to get my ducks in a row if I ever want to see the light at the end of the tunnel again! I do believe God works in mysterious ways, with his own sense of humor, and that I will make it through!
Stay tuned for most posts..